By Lisa McDonald

My sister used to call me “morbid.” Morbid? What a strange word to use to describe your baby sister. I looked it up and this is what Webster says: to be morose, gloomy, or dark. Why would she call me that? Well, in my youth, I was quite a connoisseur of horror genre. I was, in the best description of terms, obsessed. I couldn’t get enough. Whether if it was watching the Exorcist twice on TV (even driving an hour to my sister’s home where she had cable to see it), reading about how rats will take over the world, dabbling with tarot cards, watching every vampire movie I could get my hands on, having séances and playing with OUJI boards or dragging my dates to all manner of “slasher” films in the 70s, I was hooked. I had read EVERY Stephen King book he had written and salivated when a new one was said to be released. I could sit through a horror movie with a dead stare, not even getting scared, hoping and wishing for more gore and special effects. Just like a drug addict finds out quickly that the simplest drugs lose their impact and they start to look for more powerful ones, I did the same with horror. “See if you can scare me this time.”  This was the motor I lived by. So I was always on the prowl for the grossest, goriest, and scariest book or movie available.

            The more I sank into this world, the less aware I became of my “morbidity.” It seemed that everyone else could see it within me except myself, until one fateful day. I was on a date and had connived my way into going to see one of the Amityville sequels. (My date, may I add, was not happy about this but went along with me, I guess, since he enjoyed my company.) Sitting in the theatre I gobbled down my popcorn while watching a demon from hell destroy a family, a priest, and everything in his path. I wasn’t very scared and kept telling myself, “It’s got to get scarier here in a minute.”

            Near the end of the movie, there came a scene where a priest was cornering this demon in the home’s attic, trying to destroy him by stating scripture, (or as Hollywood views scripture let’s say.) At that moment, whether it was really in the movie or just for my viewing, the demon turned his head and looked straight at me and said, “I’ve got you now.” At that point I began to shake and tremble. Tears came next. My date kept asking what was wrong but all I could do was blubber and tell him that we had to leave. He had to practically carry me to the car because I was so inconsolable. I had finally understood and become aware of what was happening to me through this obsession of mine. Satan had succeeded in getting my mind so far off God that all I dwelled upon was his evil workmanship (anything that was repulsive, disgusting, or filthy) so I had no room for things of my Father’s Kingdom. I was duped and I believed, if I had not come to my senses, would have given myself over to the “dark side” of the occult and sorcery in more extreme ways. I thank my Heavenly Father for loving me enough to show me what I was doing.

            Just as an alcoholic refers to himself or herself as a “recovering alcoholic”, I consider myself a “recovering occultist” because there is always a pull toward the “dark side.” I experience at times a drawing, although weaker now than before, to call psychics to find out the future. As an alcoholic always has to fight the urge for that one drink, I fight with myself concerning reading horror novels and especially watching “those” type of movies. It is a battle that I have just about, through God’s help, been released from but in so many ways I am still weak. I couldn’t do it myself. But with God, all things are possible.

            My brother-in-law prophesied over me one day and told me that I have a special ability to “tap in” to the spirit world. But because of my past, the problem I have with this gift is deciding which spirit world I am tapping into, Heaven or hell.”

            I tell you my story for this reason…Satan is subtle and is a liar. Just as I, through somewhat innocent curiosity, had my first séance or read my first horror novel, many others are confused into calling psychics, reading tarot cards and allowing secular music to control their lives.

Genesis 3:1a  Now the serpent was more subtle and crafty than any living creature of the field which the Lord God had made.

John 8:44 You are of your father, the devil, and it is your will to practice the lusts and gratify the desires (which are characteristic) of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a falsehood, he speaks what is natural to him, for he is a liar (himself) and the father of lies and of all that is false.

            From the beginning of time, God has warned us of Satan’s longing to control and own us along with his plans for our destruction. God, through Moses and Joshua, told the Canaanites that when they possessed the Promised Land, that they should not take on the practices of the people already living there. Their ways would be different from the inhabitants of this land, and He wanted to make sure they would not be swayed. As in this next scripture in Deuteronomy, God makes it quite clear that sorcery, magic, psychics, horoscopes, and other idol worship (seeking guidance from anyone or anything else but God) are abominable practices and will not be tolerated by God.  

Deut. 18:9-13 When you come into the land which the Lord your God gives you, you shall not learn to follow the abominable practices of these nations. There shall not be found among you anyone who makes his son or daughter pass through the fire, or who uses divination, or is a soothsayer, or an augur, or a sorcerer, or a charmer, or a medium or a wizard, or a necromancer. For all who do these things are an abomination to the Lord, and it is because of these abominable practices that the Lord your God is driving them out before you. You shall be blameless (and absolutely true) to the Lord your God. 

            Ever since Adam’s fall, we (the human race) have been in a battle within ourselves between our flesh and what God wants us to do. Satan lives, bargains and maneuvers in the realm of the flesh. That is why we, as Christians, have to be strong and keep our armor constantly polished and ready. Satan knows what buttons to push (just like my past craving for horror genre.) He knows what makes you tick and will use it against you.

            Before you ask, no, Satan cannot read out minds. Only God is omniscient (all-knowing.) But Satan has eyes and ears of his own plus an army of demons he can dispatch at a whim to watch and observe us. By watching our behavior, he gains an inroad to things which could cause our destruction. 

Galatians 5:17, 19-21 For the desires of the flesh are opposed to the Holy Spirit and the (desires of the) Spirit are opposed to the flesh (godless human nature); for these are antagonistic to each other (continually withstanding and in conflict with each other), so that you are not free but are prevented from doing what you desire to do.

Now the doings (practices) of the flesh are clear (obvious); they are immorality, impurity, indecency, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, anger (ill temper), selfishness, divisions (dissensions), party spirit (factions, sects with peculiar opinions, heresies), envy, drunkenness, carousing, and the like. I warn you beforehand, just as I did previously, that those who do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

            Dear brothers and sisters in Christ, please be on the alert! Be very careful with what you allow your eyes to see and your ears to hear. Satan will be quick to help you rationalize the innocence of what you are doing, watching or hearing, but the truth lies with God and His Holy Word. Even if we do not read God’s Word to understand the battle we are in, we just need to look at today’s headlines. The boys involved in the Columbine shooting were said to have listened to “acid rock” music and had horror games on their Playstation/Nintendo units. There are many references to youth suicides after attending concerts where “hate music” is played. Many people have become caught in the net of psychics, pouring out their hard-earned money just to hear what they should do the next day, and as a result they become confused and negative. (I know someone like this personally.) There is, I believe, a correlation between children and teenagers viewing pornography and a lack of respect given to other people in their schools and even in their homes.

            I am sure some of you are sitting there thinking what a “goody-two-shoes” I am or calling me a “kill joy.” But remember, I have been in the trenches and I understand now the significance and ramifications of what I do, concerning spiritual matters, whether good or evil. God has allowed me to see His gracious Spirit poured out upon my life, with His many blessings. But, along with His love and forgiveness, He has also allowed me to see the evil that is lurking at my door, trying to sway me, just like with Peter.

I Peter 5:8 Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the evil, roams around like a lion roaring (in fierce hunger), seeking someone to seize upon and devour.

            As my brother-in-law had prophesied, I have had visions, dreams, impressions (whatever you wish to call them) of both the wonderful security and peace of God’s Kingdom, but also of the darkness and creepiness of the underworld.

            Vision one: It was in the middle of the night and I was in bed. I began to feel a presence like there was someone else in the room with me. Suddenly this presence jumped or leaped on top of me and tried to strangle me. I could almost feel a pillow being pushed over my face. The presence lay atop of me, pinning me down. There was such evilness in the room that it was suffocating. I screamed out, “I bind you Satan. I rebuke you! I’m a child of the King!” Immediately the presence was gone. 

            Vision two: I was asleep when my husband came to bed. I awoke and was trying to get back to sleep. At first I heard a door open and looked to see if anyone had come into the room (which they had not). I had been experiencing unusual pain due to my pregnancy and was concerned about what the doctor would say the next day. Suddenly I felt the hair over my right ear being moved. I thought to myself, “How sweet of Chris.” until I realized that his arms were around me. As soon as I realized that this was supernatural, I heard the sweet, peaceful voice of Jesus saying, “Daughter of God, your baby is anointed. He will preach to nations. This pain that you feel is a test. Embrace it and accept it. I will take care of you. I will always be with you.”

            As you can see, I have no doubt that we are in a battle. Satan almost “had me” (controlled me totally) years ago and he hasn’t forgotten how close he came to success. He keeps trying to claim me for himself. No, he isn’t after me because I am anything special. Satan feels the same about anyone who loves God and wants to bring truth to this fleshly world. Someone told me once, “If you are suffering tribulation then you know you are doing something right. It makes Satan tremendously nervous.”

            As the title of this journal states, “Who Has You?” take stock of your life, dear friend, and see what is occupying your time. It will become evident if you truthfully search your heart.

Matthew 6:24 No one can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will stand by and be devoted to the one and despise and be against the other. You cannot serve God and mammon (deceitful riches, money, possessions, or whatever is trusted in.)

Jesus was speaking generally about money in this passage but His point was idolatry. What are we worshipping before God? We cannot serve Satan and God. Even if we serve God 99% of the time, that is still considered rebellion in His eyes. He wants our 100%.

A question we need to ask is: How are we to keep ourselves clean, guard our lives, and keep out of Satan’s clutches?

Matthew 6:33 But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then all these things taken together will be given you besides.

            The Bible is very clear about what Christians should do if found in ANY type of sin. First repent, then live free of that sin by praying for God’s cleansing and his guidance. The word “repent” out of Vine’s Dictionary is defined as: a turning away from disobedience or rebellion and a turning back to God; a change of mind; a feeling of remorse for past conduct; something that leads to a fundamental change in a person’s relationship with Christ.

            The following verse is Peter talking to Simon. He was so impressed with the signs and wonders Peter was able to do (with the help of the Holy Spirit) that he was asking to pay for them. He wanted to buy the Holy Spirit’s power.  Simon, being a sorcerer and, as most of us who live in the occult, was looking for a quick fix, a counterfeit to the real deal to fill up the hole in our souls which only God can fill.

Acts 8:22 Repent of this wickedness and pray to the Lord. Perhaps he will forgive you having such a though in your heart.

But the fact remains, to become totally delivered from the occult, idolatry, adultery, lying, cheating, etc. (any type of sin), repentance is the first thing we must do.

Acts 3:19-20 Repent then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord, and that he may send the Christ, who has been appointed for you..even Jesus.     

            After repentance, the recovering occultist must realize that they may still be weak in certain areas. Remember what I said about the pull or drawing toward the “dark side?”  Daily prayer offered up to God, asking for His strength and support during weakness is necessary, not only for God to know you are serious about this change in your life, but also for the person praying. By verbally saying that you renounce those areas in your life and give them all to Our Father, Satan hears this, and pretty soon there will be a strength flow through you and the things of the past will have less and less appeal.  The door to the occult will begin to close.

Psalm 141:3-4 Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord, keep watch over the door of my lips. Let not my heart be drawn to what is evil, to take part in wicked deeds with men who are evildoers; let me not eat of their delicacies.

            Let me explain what I mean with a personal illustration. This past weekend, my family was shopping at a nearby bookstore. I had gone to the front checkout counter to ask about a specific book. In front of met, the lady checking out was purchasing a set of tarot cards. My heart was instantly grieved and I immediately began praying silently for her deliverance. In years past I would have been so drawn to these occult items that I would have searched for them in the store to consider purchasing them. But now, all I felt was repulsion for them and a compassion for this woman and the trap she is evidently walked into.

            As we continue to repent (daily if need be) and pray earnestly, God will allow us to see how we are growing and maturing in our faith which has been placed in Him.

Shalom (Peace) be with you, my brothers and sisters in Christ and my prayer for you is that you will continually seek first His kingdom because God has our best interest planned, unless someone else. Keep alert and confident that God will help you overcome whatever has invaded the space in your heart that used to belong to Him. He is ever faithful. When asked “Who has you?” what will YOU say?